By Tyler Karlberg
originally published on 4/15/22 for A Little Slack Publishing.
Ah, Easter!Â
The pastel-tinted holiday filled with frilly bonnets, dainty doilies, darling baskets, and countless ways for me to continue to disappoint my children. At least with other holidays, you can somewhat disguise your shortcomings by placing blame on an elf, or whatever, but Easter is unyielding. So own it.Â
Here are some must-do activities to make your day hauntingly memorable.
The Eggs
Render the eggs inedible.
These scientifically impossible hard-boiled eggs landed me smack dab in the middle of a Buzzfeed article alongside other parents who definitely also have their shit together.
The Easter Rabid
Place your kid directly on the lap of their first significant childhood trauma.
And then tell them to smile.
I mean, come on. Does your child at least get a voucher for therapy on the way out?
The Themed Treats
Dream big. Try hard.
Fail harder. That looks literally nothing like anything. Throw it away.
The Baskets
Be so good at hiding the basket that you forget where you put it.
And then cook it.
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Wishing a Happy Easter to you and your families.
Cheers to a day full of picture perfect moments and Instagram worthy fails!